Time flies...

It's been quite a while since I last posted and looking at my most recent post, I was quite correct in knowing that something was going to happen during the trip to Utah to see my fiance. The thing that happened was that I never left. What was supposed to be a two week trip turned into my never leaving. I found myself a job here in town, working at the local McDonald's. I picked up the job towards the end of April. Recently, I've been working on what needs to be a crew trainer, which is the step between crew and manager. I hope to make manager soon after. I like my coworkers and the managers are pretty awesome. A number of the regulars that come in daily told me when I first started all told me what a great crew I was to be working with. And they've been pretty spot on. I've been working pretty much full time since late May or so and even though it feels like I live there, I wouldn't trade my 40 hour work week for anything. Although I could do without the shifts starting at 6AM but getting done at 2PM is kinda nice.

Learning to live with with people who aren't my parents and younger brother has been quite the experience, especially when one of those people is the person I'm marrying. Living with him has brought us closer than the distance ever did and we've been learning how to make this work beyond phone calls and Facebook. And to be honest, staying down here has been worth it, I think. Any problem that either one of us are dealing with is more easily resolved and I like him being the first person I see in the morning before work, the first person I see when I get off work, and the last person before bed. Living with him has allowed us to grow more as a couple than all those phone calls ever did. It's been really showing me that I wouldn't want to be with anyone other than him.

Utah is way different than Washington state. It's so brown here that it makes me miss all the green of home. However, the sunny days have been nice, despite all the heat the summer days bring. It's been nice to be able to walk outside in shorts and a shirt without having to bring a jacket along for just in case purposes. It rained pretty good today and I doubt it got any higher than maybe the mid 80's or so. While it was raining, it was noticeably cooler (in the 70's, according to the grocery store across the street from work) and I actually had to wear a jacket out since I was so cold! I haven't worn a jacket here in months, not at least since right around when I picked up work at McDonald's and even then it was usually just at night when Jack and I would take a walk because we couldn't sleep. However, I'm liking it for the most part. The only downside is I miss my family, friends, and the Tacoma/Olympia area of Washington. I can't wait to go back for a visit.

Not this feeling again...

Change is in the air again and I can't help but feel it coming. It was fairly nice out today, so I decided to go take a walk to one or two places. I was on my way home when I realized it. After I got home from said walk, I tried to remember the last time I had this feeling and realized I had posted about it. After glancing through my previous posts, I came across the post I was looking for. As I looked at the date on it, I noticed that it was only a couple of weeks before I saw Jack. And now, I am only a week away (six days, if you want to get technical since it's after 12AM Sunday morning as I type this) from seeing him again and the winds of change are upon me once again. What is with seeing him and having this happen beforehand? I just might lose my sanity if this keeps up...

The change that happened last time was a good thing: Jack and I got engaged. However, I can't help but wonder what this new change is to be.  Life has a way of throwing me the most random events, or even people, (which makes me think God has a funny sense of humor) and makes me deal with it just to see how well I handle the situation/person.

The only change I can think of coming up is the trip to Utah. I have been avoiding the place like the plague since I joined the church, claiming I would never go there for even so much for a visit. You would think I've learned the lesson of not saying I'm not going to do something because I usually end up doing it. Never gonna take French classes? Did it twice. Never gonna go to Europe? Did it summer of 2006 (which was a happy surprise more than anything). Never go to Utah? Looks like I'm 3 for 3.

I really should start learning this whole "never say never" lesson. Cuz it doesn't seem to be working out too well for me. And even though I don't want to be patient and wait to see what this change is, I will just have to wait it out and see what's in store for me and know that it's for the best in the long run.

Pretty sure goals are overrated

Over the last couple of weeks, I've realized more and more that I've got way so many goals going that it's insanity. What's worse is none of it is written down. I don't know why I don't bother writing the stuff down. It isn't like there is a shortage of paper and pencils in my house or anything. I just never bother writing it down. How I even bother to remember to journal daily is beyond me and even then I miss a couple of days here and there and end up having to make up those days and don't remember half of the stuff I wanted to write in the first place. I don't even know how I'm keeping up with a reading schedule passed out by someone from church a couple of weeks ago. It's a 40 day reading challenge and it's on the more intense side: 12 or so pages daily to finish the Book of Mormon by the start of General Conference on the 31st of the month. But it's probably a good thing that I got myself into the rhythm of doing that kind of thing towards the end of last August. 

Anyways, back to the topic at hand. Maybe I'm weird or something but I divided them up between home/personal and work. And most of them fall into the "home/personal" group, which has subgroups and everything. The subgroups can range from music I want to get to books I want to read to what I need to take with me to Utah and getting it packed (this is a new one since it was recently decided between the fiancé and I that I would go see him for a while so we could spend some time together). I remember once hearing a saying from someone that a goal not written down is just a dream. Or was it a wish? Either way, a goal unwritten is bound to be forgotten in the long run. I really need to start writing mine down. And I'm pretty sure I'll take down a small forest in the process.

Speaking of the music goal list, there was a song I heard on the radio today (well, yesterday if you want to get techincal since it's 2:30AM as I write this) on the way to Albertson's that I hadn't heard before from what sounded like ACDC that I would like to get my hands on. I have a love/hate relationship with the radio. Sometimes, it'll give me new stuff to listen to that I like (and can never remember later since I don't bother writing it down like I should) or they play the same songs over and over and kill the song. Really hoping they start changing that last part soon. I get the reasoning behind the repeating of the songs, I really do, but there's more than just those songs out there that are constantly being repeated that are worth the air time.

A song I realized that I liked recently is Red Hot Chili Peppers' "Dance, Dance, Dance." Pretty sure most of the reasoning behind liking it is the music behind the words but the words work pretty well. I'm pretty entertained by it. But maybe it's just because it's me and I'm weird.

Days like today...

I love days like today. The YSA branch I go to had a temple trip this afternoon to the Seattle LDS temple to do baptisms for the dead. It was awesome to just sit in the baptistery and look at the font. Pretty sure I could spend forever just sitting there and watching people do baptisms. There's something about it that's calming to me. It allows me to think and clear my head to figure out what it is I'm supposed to be doing. Life has been crazy lately and the temple was just what I needed.

The best part was after the temple trip. We had gone to the stake center for dinner since we were to attend the baptism of someone soon after and wouldn't have time to go to an actual restaurant. Towards the end, I found out that one of my favorite missionaries who has been home a little more than a year was the one to be performing the baptism of the girl being baptized. I was way excited. When I finally saw him, I couldn't stop myself from running and hugging him. It's been close to a year since I last saw him and couldn't be more stoked about seeing him. Plus, it made my fiancé jealous since that's his favorite companion from the mission since they both served in the WATAC and spent six months together.

Today was pretty much a day I wouldn't mind repeating one or two more times. Especially getting to see one of my favoritest RMs who served in the WATAC. Only the coolest missionaries serve their missions in the WATAC.

Engaged? o.O

I feel like I'm a bit late in writing about this, even though the event itself only happened a couple of weeks ago.

On the 14th of January, my absolute favorite person in the world flew in to the WATAC from Utah to see me for a week long visit (definitely the highlight of the month). We hadn't seen each other in ~1.5 years and this time was so much better (no more missionary rules placed on him!). Although I was way excited about seeing him again, the time apart was just enough to put my nerves on edge. But I knew the week was gonna be awesome with him there and we had some pretty awesome adventures planned (even though some didn't get to happen due to the fluke weather well had the whole week). Even with the weird weather, we managed to have a good time together.

 The two of us do not fight with each other. We generally don't have a reason to. Unless the weather gives us snow. And then the snow is flying because we just had to create a fight between the two of us somehow. Having a snowball fight with Jack was the closest thing to a decent snowball fight that I've had for a while (and by "while," I mean "years" [one of the guys who lived up the road from me in New York when we were in school used to come over all the time in the winter to go sledding in my backyard with his little brother and sister and he and I would have snowball fights between the two of us]). The backyard after Jack and I were done definitely looked like there had been a pretty good fight going on. Side note: This (--->) isn't my backyard.

Over the course of the week, I realized more and more that I don't ever want to go back to not having him in my life. He means way too much to me to just let go of the relationship we have. The visit made me realize that I love him way more than I thought it possible to do. No wonder why he started off his mission in Lakewood and I had started to investigate the church the month before he came out (I needed to be ready for baptism so we'd be forced to meet for the first time due to his companion conducting my baptism interview two days previous to baptism) and why he came to Lakewood halfway through his mission (so I'd remember him later on once he got off his mission). I'm finally in the right relationship with a great guy who I can't imagine my life without. He's been nothing short of amazing, which is exactly what I need him to be. He'd have to be amazing to be able to put up with me as well as he does. I cannot wait to marry him. ♥

Now to the questions everyone's been bothering me with. How did he propose? We were hanging out just the two of us before bed and talking when he asked. I know he didn't ask in any spectacular way and that seems rather dull and boring to some people but I thought it worked. All that really mattered to me was that he asked; I didn't care how he did it. When are you getting married? In November. Don't ask which day. We haven't gotten that far yet. We only have a very small handful of plans made so far and we're slowly getting what we want figured out between the two of us. Where are you getting married? We want to do it in Utah and are in the process of picking a temple.

Stake Relief Society Presidency visit... Oh boy.

This last Sunday at church was my Sunday to teach in Relief Society. However, I didn't know that it was to be a Sunday that the stake's Relief Society presidency was to visit the branch. I didn't think much of it when I saw one of the members of the presidency sitting in the chapel and kinda shrugged it off when I heard they all were visiting. Towards the end of testimony meeting, it hit me that they just might be staying the whole three hours for church. When I didn't see any of them during the Gospel Doctrine class for Sunday school, I thought they had left. I was wrong.

When I saw them walking into the Relief Society room third hour, nerves hit. I wasn't sure if I could teach the lesson all of a sudden just because they were there. I would have been more than happy to have listened to the pianist play the whole time but no such luck. If anything, the lesson went a little bit better than normal because they were there.

The best part was when it was over, the secretary (who I'm used to seeing in my home ward and am so used to having her be in the front of the room and my being in the chairs) came over to me and started talking to me. I think I've seen her once since I left the family ward to start attending the YSA branch a little more than two years ago and she said that it was great to see how I've been growing spiritually. It was rather nice to be able to hear that from someone. I've been put through a number of trials within the last couple of years but only recently (since last May or so), have I noticed any of the changes myself. I just hope that I am changing into the person that I am meant to be.

Change?

Things have been changing like crazy over the last few months. And I think most of it has definitely been for the better. I've been learning more and more about myself and have been figuring out more about what I'm willing to put up with, what's worth fighting, and what's worth not giving the time of day. I've gotten so many lessons over the last few months that I can't help but be grateful since it's making me become a better person because of those lessons. And I've had a wonderful person by my side for the last couple of months who I'm so glad that I have. Jack's been an absolutely amazing person and I can't believe that I have him in my life. He just fits me so well and he makes me want to become a better person because of him.

He's one of very few people that can get me to calm down when something is going on that I don't want to have anyone else know about what's going on. I  can go to him about absolutely everything and it's so nice to be able to finally have a boyfriend I can go to with any problem I have when I've never been able to go to a guy who wasn't just my best friend. Although it probably helped that we were such good friends before we were together as a couple. I can't wait to see where Jack and I go and I'm so excited about our future. I can't imagine my life without him in it. ♥

2012 is going to be a year full of changes for me. I can feel it. I'm excited to see what happens but kind of nervous as well since the year is such an unknown. However, I'm sure I can get through it. Besides Jack, I have some amazing people in my life and they've all come into my life pretty much through the LDS church. Life wouldn't be the same without them since everyone has taught me something.

2012, bring it on.